Language technology - Reflexive Essay

Sema Culhaci
Language technology workshop
Reflexive Essay
7/31/10


What it means to me to be technophobe

During the language technology workshop I became aware of the fact that I am "technophobe". But what
exactly does it mean to fear technology? Do I just hesitate to use language technology in my classroom or
does it imply that I am scared of being controlled by technology? Indeed, I have to reflect on this in order to better understand what it means for me and the use of technology in my language classes.
Indeed, i fear a lot of things: I am scared of spiders, of heights, of uncontrollable moments, of walking on thin ice on frozen lakes as well as failing an important exam. Whenever I am confronted with these things, I become overwhelmed by my feelings and cannot think raisonably. My feelings control what I do and think and I do not feel comfortable - I just want to escape from that particular situation. I feel helpless and a am exposed to this uncontrollable situation. Unfortunately, I do not need to be directly confronted with those fears because it seems to be mentally stored in my subconscious. Being aware of my reactions regarding my fears, I can gain a better understanding of how this could affect the use of technology in the classroom.
Technology - especailly the means of new media - are really powerful in terms of being uncontrollable in certain moments. Even the best lesson plans and the thoroughly prepared teaching materials are useless when you face technical problems like a power breakdown, a white screen on your laptop where there is supposed to be displayed the teaching material or simply the complex software of a computer program. During my work experience, I faced similiar problems and all the feelings I mentioned above arised. I was uncertain of what to do, I wanted to escape but of course I could not so I was exposed to technology and I was not in power anymore. I think this is what I fear the most - the loss of power. That is a fundemental reason why I would probably avoid using too much technology because I do not want to feel this these moments. I know about the positive effects but my  fear of technology inhibits the use of it. I am technophobe and what does it mean to me? I think I have to overcome my fears and be more relaxed and open towards technology. The language workshop helped me to figure out my attitude towards the use of technology.